Quotes of the week: “Are Chelsea just throwing money around?”

In this week's selection of best quotes, Chelsea are at it again, Colin Montgomerie talks about his bogus journey, and we recap some impressive denials.

You massive tease
"good afternoon guys. i made up my mind. see you later. thanks" — As if Eden Hazard hadn't been stringing us on long enough, he takes to Twitter to let us know a decision is imminent.
"I'm signing for the champion's league winner" — Aha, so Chelsea then. Unless, of course, he's going to add '2007/8' in a few days.
"Chelsea really wanted me last summer and paid a lot for me but after a while I thought: 'Are you just throwing money around?'" - Romelu Lukaku says what one or two football fans have long wondered.
Footballers will be footballers
"The FA learned from the experience in 2006. The England team did. The England players did. That wasn't ideal for anybody. It was symptomatic of the times. Between 2002 and 2007 everyone got carried away with everything in life. It is a different world now and those mistakes won't happen again under any manager or any regime. The platform won't be given." Gary Neville lays down the law on WAGs
"The reaction of the Bayern fans and their boos is scandalous. It's not good at all. You'll notice that none of the Bayern Munich players were targeted, just Robben after he played the Champions League final. They've closed a door in his face, it was a tough evening for Robben. If it depended on me, I'd tell him to come to Inter ... this summer!" — Wesley Sneijder turns agent.
"I have loved my 3 years at the club and it sadness me to right this but want use to here it from me first. ‪#lovedmytime" — Grant Holt tells Norwich fans he wants to leave (we think).
But hang on, I thought they were staying?
"I never said I'm leaving. I've said I never know what's going to happen tomorrow. I absolutely love it here. I've loved my time here. Because I don't say much, people want to go on message boards, fuel things and make up absolute nonsense." — Paul Lambert denies any link with Aston Villa on May 22.
"The club is pleased to confirm that Brendan has declined the current opportunity to speak to the Anfield club about the vacant position. The Swansea manager is currently working hard to strengthen the squad in readiness for the new Barclays Premier League campaign." — Swansea deny any interest from Brendan Rodgers in the Liverpool job.
Best of the rest
"The ECB is disappointed by the timing of Kevin's decision less than four months before we defend our ICC World Twenty20 title". — Normally when a player retires you say something nice about them — Hugh Morris, England managing director, does not oblige.
"I find it incredible as the world No 1 in my sport, I may not participate in the Games due to the 'opinion' of a committee. I do not want to be a precedent. I want the chance to win a gold medal for Great Britain. My whole career is at stake with this decision. I hope that this process never happens again to any other athlete in British Taekwondo or any other sport." — Aaron Cook asks how the world number one can be overlooked for an Olympic place.
"The selection panel's primary aim has always been to select athletes who have the best potential to win the best set of medals for Great Britain. Their decisions take into account a number of factors and ultimately these decisions are based on the panel's expert judgment in selecting athletes who will be best placed to bring success for Team GB." — GB Taekwondo offer an explanation, which is swiftly rejected by the British Olympic Association.
"We have gone to great lengths to find top quality, tasty food that celebrates the best of Britain." — LOCOG chief Paul Deighton defends the London 2012 spectator menu, which includes such famously British specialties as Singapore noodles, pizza, burritos, jerk chicken wings and lamb rogan josh.
"It took Jack 24 years. This is my 17th year into it. I still feel like I have plenty of time — it's about giving myself the greatest amount of opportunities to win them on the back nine on Sunday. The more chances I give myself, I figure I'm going to clip a few of them." — Tiger Woods still insists that he will overhaul Jack Nicklaus's record of 18 Majors.
"Who in their right mind would do that? But yes, I did. I left Wentworth at 2pm, was home at 8pm, had tea with the family, left at 11pm and got here just after 6am." - Colin Montgomerie confirms that he did indeed drive 900 miles to fetch an old favourite putter to use in US Open qualifying at Walton Heath. He missed out by several shots.
"I had no sleep last night. I've been back once for a putter and then I really had nothing else to do, so I went home. I left at 11.30pm and got here at 6.30am. I just had the Eddie Stobart trucks for company." — Monty again, after doing the same drive once again on Monday before driving back down to Celtic Manor for the Wales Open. "It's 'me' time. I'm very busy and I don't get a lot of time to myself," he added when asked why he didn't fly.
And have yourself a lovely Jubilee weekend
"Ok, so it's the Queen's Jubilee. Great, 2 extra days off work." — But, Joey Barton, do you get Bank Holidays if you're a footballer? What about if you're a footballer and it's the summer? What about if you're a footballer, and it's the summer, and you're banned for the next 12 matches anyway?